Isolated and Lonely? Two Empowering Tools You Need to Reconnect with Yourself and the World

If you have experienced a TBI, you may feel like you are alone in the world and that no one understands what you are experiencing. You may not have the energy you used to, conversations may be harder, your role at work may have changed, and the people closest to you may even treat you differently. Add to that the "clinical limbo" that TBI survivors so often experience, and it is no wonder you feel so isolated.

The grief, shame, and frustration may feel overwhelming. Perhaps you have lost hope and even trust in the healthcare system and the people you love. Sadly, this can leave you feeling disconnected and isolated.

Relationships are strained during recovery. If you don't have a significant other or family, this may feel even more isolating to you. You may even be introverted or prefer to be alone during this time. The pain, the energy drain, the lack of focus, the confusion, the loss of so much, and the financial struggle make it seem easier to stay home and not engage.

However…

According to the U.S. Surgeon General's 2023 Report, the health impact of social disconnection is similar to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day. This is for the general population. Imagine the impact on a TBI patient. Recovering from a traumatic brain injury is not just a physical journey.

Your recovery and well-being require human connection, compassion, and community.

Tool One: Reconnect with Yourself Through Self-Compassion

One thing you can do is to begin to reconnect with yourself by offering yourself some compassion. No matter what is going on within you or around you, there is never a time when you can't simply pause and allow yourself to receive a little love and kindness.

Place your hand on your heart and notice the rise and fall of your chest for a few rounds of breath and then slowly say these words in your mind or out loud:

May I be at ease May I be at peace May I be well May I be loved May I… (add whatever you feel you need at this moment)

You can do this anytime, anywhere, such as in moments of struggle, loneliness, or any difficult emotion. You can also practice during a transition time, such as when you first wake up in the morning. These phrases aren't intended to force you to be or do anything. They are an invitation to consider loving kindness towards yourself. This skill helps you build internal resilience and hope.

Tool Two: Discover Your Core Values

Having lost a sense of self, finding meaning and purpose is essential in helping reconnect with the world and the things you love. The second practice I suggest is to discover your core values. Core values are what drive your behaviors and decisions. When you know your top five, you can make decisions on what you want to do, who you want to spend time with, and what matters most to you. They are your guide when everything else seems dark. Making choices based on your values helps fatigue and loneliness because you will have confidence and clarity in who you are, what you want, and what you need to do. While core values seem simple, they are remarkably grounding and empowering.

While the road may seem long and winding, you never have to go at it alone. There are always people who are willing to help you. Your path begins with reconnecting to yourself in a kind way, and knowing who you are at a core level so that you can choose who and what is most important to you.

At Unite, we are here for you. Please follow us on social media and reach out to our team members any time.

I look forward to meeting you.

Amy McCae — Senior Life Coaching Specialist

Reference: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community (2023)